I had a loose suture removed from my right eye yesterday!
Yep, I still have 16 threads holding my new cornea in place, even though it’s been nearly 1.5 years since the graft. The 35 stitches unfortunately aren’t dissolvable and need to be gradually removed every few months with anaesthetic, via the surgeon’s amazingly steady hand using tweezers and a slit lamp!
I should’ve worked out that I needed another eye appointment as over the last fortnight my eye has been progressively become more tired, sore and noticeably red to others. However, considering my multiple other issues, I justified and ignored these symptoms. I put up with feeling more discomfort, being more sensitive to light and becoming tired when doing any screen work.
My body, as warped as it is, still lets me know when something isn’t right.
After dismissing all the symptoms for 2 weeks, they got worse and I finally booked an appointment with my eye doctor.
Sure enough, the suture was loose and was removed there and then.
“Don’t blink” my doctor said looking through a slit lamp at my eye and simultaneously pulling out the untangled thread with tiny metal sutures.
It’s not pleasant but it’s out. And only ten more to go. However, next time I hope I don’t wait quite so long.
So often, it isn’t until we are forced to STOP that we finally listen to all the messages our own bodies have been telling us. You’d think from all my lived experiences: a stroke, a cold, a back ache or a blister, I would know this by now.
Whilst it’s important to listen to these symptoms, it’s tricky for many because if we do, we can feel stuck and engulfed by these many things. In fact, we often can’t see past them.
I admit to everyday ignoring or choosing to not let my many issues dictate my day. However, I know that it’s the things I’ve weaved into my day, whether it’s writing or walking, that ensures I have time to tune into how I’m feeling. It has always been at these times, when Im forced to ‘be’ and ‘reflect’, that I take notice and often leads to me booking that check-up or taking that medication.
So, let’s get out of our own way and choose to STOP and listen to ourselves more. We need to give ourselves Permission to Pause.
How can you do this? What areas in your life enable you to tune into your body and mind?